The Eejits Club
    Funny Scots Poems

by Gregor Steele

Jine the club and become an eejit. Gregor Steele’s poem read by actor Euan Mitchell.

  AUDIO - The Eejits Club

by Gregor Steele

Sae ye want tae jine the Eejits Club?
Weel shaw us yir CV –
Ye dae doughnuts in yer motor
At the retail park Grand Prix,
Fae the first tae tenth November,
Ye set fireworks aff at nicht,
Ye share things ye see on Facebook,
Withoot checkin if they’re richt.

Ye willnae hae a vaccine,
It’s aw “GPS and DNA”,
Ye think climate change is havers,
Cause it snawed wan year in May,
Weelcome tae the Eejits Club!
Ah say withoot a qualm,
Though ye’ll stert at Grade Three Dunderheid,
Ye’ll soon mak Super Bam.