Nae Pets Allowed
    Funny Scots Poems


NAE PETS ALLOWED
by Thomas Clark

The rule is Nae Pets Allowed in one boy’s hoose. But see if that’s gonnae stop him in Thomas Clark’s poem, read by actor Molly Quinn.

 
  AUDIO - Nae Pets Allowed




Nae Pets Allowed
by Thomas Clark

I’m no allowed tae hae a dug,
(Ma Maw thinks they’ve got fleas.)
A sparra or a braw wee sprug,
(They’d mak ma Granda sneeze.)

I’m no allowed a bonnie doo,
A deuk or crocodile,
An octopus or Hielan coo,
(Ma Da wid run a mile.)

I’m no allowed a chookie-hen,
(Their cleuks get awfy maukit.)
I’m no allowed a tod, ye ken,
(I’d need a lead tae walk it.)

I’m no allowed a bubbly-jock,
A baudrons or a lambie,
I’m no allowed a swallae-hawk,
In case it stairts a rammy.

I’m no allowed a gowk or craw,
A midgie or a cuddy,
I’m no allowed a pet at aw,
Jist gang ask onybody,

And if I want some geese or kye,
A beastie, big or wee,
I need tae hide it oot the wey
Whaur naebody can see,

Sae in a box aneath the flair,
I’ve got a clatty moose,
And in the press, ahint the stair,
A HERD O PLATYPUS.